Monday, March 28, 2011

Facial Hair

One thing that I love completely, is human behavior.

I'm pretty sure I've already written about this plenty of times, but it's a big deal with me. If you have the smallest movements when listening, I can tell how you are feeling. The way your seated position is, your walking stature, and your image of clothing. Your handwriting tells who you are best. All of it. Even facial hair on men.

One thing that's been standing out a lot to me is facial hair.
I hate Hate HATE!!!! facial hair.
Have you ever seen two men with the same facial hair get along and into a well lit conversation?

The beard shows that a man is a family man. Family is important to the person. When he is around other people, he's most likely going to be the mascot or the father figure of the group. If he encounters a man with a beard, they will most likely reminisce about the good old days or talk about how their children have changed. It is rare that you will see them hang out together and laugh together.

Getting to less hair, the goatee. Ever seen a male goat around other male goats? It can get brutal. That's the same with men and a goatee. Men with goatees are more control centered, the alpha male, as it were. They have to have things their way otherwise it's wrong. Now I ask, ever seen two men with goatees have a well lit conversation? Most likely they are going to joke about the way the other or younger people do things. They're most likely always going to think that they are right too!

Now, the petit goatee. Know what that is? That is where the hair is just on their chin. These men are competitive people. They are trying to prove something. When these men collide, don't count on either of them backing off. One will dominate surely, but the other won't be silent. These two have hard conversations. One will dominate the conversation and "prove" to be the better one, whether that be they have a more fun character or they are funnier than the other. Either way, if they both have petit goatees, they won't converse much.

From the chin to the bottom of the lip, the soul patch. Who comes to mind when you think of a soul patch? Maybe a cartoon image of the devil? Most likely, the man with a soul patch would fit that image. He is most likely to be deceitful or a manipulator. This can be both positive and negative in extremes. I rarely see these nowadays.

Moving on up, the mustache. Mustaches can look so refined and polished if one is able to pull it off. Well, mustaches are great for single men. It shows that they aren't afraid to face opposition and they tackle their issues head on. This means that they will be very opinionated, but they might not share it much.

Now to the side, sideburns. Sideburns are the weirdest "facial hair" possible. If you count it facial hair, then cool, because I would. Facial hair shows that a man is undecided of "who" he wants to be. This is the man whose opinions are always challenged and he takes that personally. If you see men with sideburns talking, they'll most likely be asking each other questions of "what else" could be out there.

Am I talking about anybody you know yet?

Finally, the shaved. No facial hair, to me, is the best. Why? This man who does not have facial hair can be one of two things. The funnest or the worst person to be around. They are the most diversified person. They don't like to hide themselves. Hence, no facial hair. You'd think this would be the family man face. They tend to show their emotions a lot or be more animated and loud. They can be fun fun FUN! or very aggressive. Like a child. These men, you will see converse a lot. Because they have the childlike outgoing attitude. Although, men with facial hair most likely will have a hard time conversing with them.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Carbon Fiber Umbrella

I was talking with a new buddy of mine, Trevor, today.


We had a conversation about Mary Poppins and what it would be like to glide using an umbrella.
At MCC we have these table that have metal umbrellas on them.


We then, in our very limited intelligence, tried to figure out how to conceptualize an umbrella that would make this Mary Poppins fable possible.


We figured that metal wouldn't do any good so we said it should be carbon fiber.
He said it should be like a corkscrew design. Then he wanted it to rotate so he wouldn't lose control.


Then changing direction became an issue.


So he said, if he put a corkscrew design on the bottom, that would help.


I said, "NO! NO WAY! If you want to change direction at a good pace, then you're going to need something that would create friction, not minimize it. You're gonna need some electrograviticpropulsion."


He gave me a confused face and replied, "What?"


"Electrograviticpropulsion! So you can split the gravity around you with electricity and be able to move in any direction that you want. You can even stand still if you wanted to."


"How on earth would I be able to do that."


"Just get some enriched uranium." I said with a calm voice.


"Where am I going to get uranium?"


"No, enriched uranium."


"Okay, where am I going to get enriched uranium?"


"You get enriched uranium from uranium."


"Ba-what?! I just asked where do you get enriched uranium and your answer is uranium?"


"Yes."


"Then where do you get uranium."
I became silent and started to laugh. Our friend Lamech walked over and got into our "oh so intelligent" conversation. He said, that he wouldn't be able to even hold on. Trevor replied, "I can just use clips."


I rebutted in a voice of audacity with, "You can't use clips!!!! You'll get stuck to it and won't be able to escape from it if something bad happens. You should use rope with a suicide wrap." XD My favorite part. I barely knew what the suicide wrap was and said it was better when I'm pretty sure it isn't.


They then got off topic and started talking about something else. I then bluntly just said, "Enriched uranium." and laughed and walked off.


The best part of leaving with a loud last sentence is seeing how many people were listening to our conversation.


I love people.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

So this is Spring Break

You know,

I've always been that kind of person who has big plans for spring break. The one who will "change" over the break and come back with a story to tell.

Psh. Yeah right!!!!

I've had plans, big ones even, but I've always had that problem of following through with it.
I never do.
It's difficult.

The only thing I've done this spring break is bowl.
Not even real bowling either, just *sigh* Wii bowling.

It all started out with a BB-Q.
The praise team got together for some fellowship time and I was invited.
Apparently I "run" the sound. *Nods head in disagreement*

Well, I went still.
I needed it.
It was fun at first, but then my brother became the hot topic of the night.
What a way to murder! relaxation.
He likes attention though.
He tries to act like he doesn't, but he likes it. A lot!
And it shows. A LOT!!

Yes, I'm sick and tired of being the back story because they all think he's the best and all that.
I hate living in his shadow and I never get recognized for my talents, just statements of how people can't keep up with me on a bike. Psh, I'm more than a cyclist!

I run too. . .

Apparently running is a big talent too. *Rolls eyes*

I wish there were more athletes around here.
You know, accountability and stuff.

So, after going off on a lot of tangents, back to the bowling.
We had a tournament that night for Wii Sports Bowling.
It was cool.
I ranked sixth out of eight.
WOOF! SUCH VICTORY! I WASN'T LAST!

I was third to last. . .

After that night, I've had this Wii Sports Bowling Fever!
Ugh, such stuff to drool about.
I love it so much.

So far, this spring break, like all others for me, is boring and a waste of time.

You should tell me about your spring break.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

I'll have you know

These past two weeks I've been messing with twisting balloon animals. I've gotten to the point where I've done plenty of animal twisting and have run out of ideas.

I'll have you know that it has become depressing to twist a balloon now.

I've made plenty of things and have even redone a few of my twists. I've made a dolphin, scorpion, stegosaurus, dog, cat, tiger, parrot, elephant, monkey, 2 types of dragons and 2 kinds of swords. What else is there to make? A T-rex? Done that. Even so that it has eyes and teeth. Hows that for fancy? What about an Apatosaurus? Done that.

I don't want to make people because that's boring. Where's the fun in that? You see people everyday. It's not every day you get to see a penguin. Done that. Yeah you see flowers everyday too, but not many colorful ones in Arizona. Done that. A cactus you say? Boring, that's like making a banana, a hot dog, a pickle, a squash, or a hyphen. Not interested and I'm pretty sure nobody else is too.

What about non animal things? Well. . . I've done a heart. I don't have enough balloons to make R2D2. I certainly don't want to make a camera. Balloon hats aren't very fun. Nobody likes to wear them.

It's taken so long to think about this that my cereal has gotten soggy.

Got any balloon ideas?